Self-Love as Routine

It’s so nice to connect again! It’s my 29th birthday today but it’s also the first day I’ve had to myself since the beginning of the month. All I want to do is that which brings me stability and joy: my routines as well as creating content.

I recently started a new job at a beautiful healing center in New York and have been transitioning out of working as a flight attendant, which has been a huge change! The deciding process took a big leap of faith & the courage to move towards joy even when I had a lot going for me already. The truth is, I wasn’t as happy as I knew I could be, and my heart was begging me to listen and to trust that no matter what, I’ll always be okay. Better than okay.

I’m still processing the change and realizing the ways I can be gentle with myself through the readjustment. This is where routine comes in. It’s becoming more and more apparent how important it is to set some time aside each day to connect with all aspects of myself (my body, mind, and spirit). I prefer having a morning routine that includes stretching & exercise, journaling and meditation.

I highly recommend experimenting with a routine that works for you and allows you to tune in; to listen to your body and obtain the wisdom of your inner knowing. It can be a strong practice of self-love, because you are dedicating time for yourself each day and creating a grounded foundation for the rest of the day to unfold.

When my routine is down and my needs are met, I can have more energy for the rest of the world. Connecting with myself inspires a drive to share my experience with you, and that’s what I intend to do more of this year and beyond ❤

Little by Little

As 2020 rushes through its start, you may have found yourselves reflecting on where 2019 went and what you were able to accomplish within that time frame.

Some of your feats may have been grand and obvious, while others were smaller victories, perhaps only really known to yourselves. Maybe you faced some disappointments as well — for the loftier goals that weren’t quite completed.

I’m here to remind you that great things take time, and to bring some love and attention to those smaller victories that continue to pave the way to your dreams.

One of my proudest accomplishments of 2019 was finding a rhythm in slowly and steadily chipping away at my goals. Even though I have these massive projects I haven’t yet accomplished, the only way I’ll do so is by taking tiny steps each day. In 2019 I found peace in scaling back and doing my best, in committing to writing this newsletter weekly, even if that was the only thing I could fully complete. I began to take more accountability for my time; first by challenging myself to work on my passions for 10 hours a week. Eventually, that strategy became obsolete, because working on my projects turned habitual.

Small steps turn into habits. Habits set the tone for your life. And with that, it’s important to mention that when we falter — whether it’s by not “doing enough”, steering off a healthy diet, or making a similar mistake, we must still root for ourselves and keep trying.

Last year I also started a daily work out practice consisting of just 10 minutes a day. Even so, there were times when I was either rushed, exhausted, or sick, and didn’t complete my work out. In the past, it would’ve been so easy to see this as a failure and to quit on the whole thing. But instead, I continued my work outs the next day that I could, even if a week had lapsed by. Removing the self-judgement, and a black and white “success/failure” mentality from the picture gave me the freedom to be imperfect and to continue moving in a positive direction the best way I could.

There is no failure when we keep going, even if it’s little by little, in fact there can sometimes be more pleasure in taking it slow — like an artist finding joy within each brush stroke of their painting.

What’s New?

Video: How to Accomplish Your 2020 Goals

In this video I talk about how you can achieve your goals this year, in 2020. I present some powerful questions you can ponder and invite you to acknowledge what you were able to complete in 2019. Furthermore, I explain how you can break down your goals into smaller, tangible steps using some personal examples, and how these small steps turn into habits that will guide you towards success.

Watch

Beginner’s Mindset

Hey guys!

I recently felt inspired and made a Youtube video for the first time in 9 months.

I started a Youtube channel three years ago, while I was still living in Vietnam. At the time I was close to finishing my teaching contract and was unsure of what my next step in life would be, but was considering teaching in another country.

As part of my research I watched tons of videos about people’s experiences abroad to give me an idea of what living in other places might be like. It was then that I realized I had something to offer: my very own experience of Vietnam.

I didn’t have a proper camera, or a mic. I simply recorded on my laptop and spoke. Back then I didn’t even know how to edit videos, so I when I messed up the first couple minutes I had to start over again. After that I didn’t over think it, and just spoke about my experience. That video ended up being the most popular on my channel by far, with over 100k views to date.

Once I started to learn how to edit videos I got fancier with the quality and more demanding with myself about how they should look. Although I definitely had some fun creating them, they eventually started to feel like work. When I went back to basics, just me in front of the camera speaking my truth, I felt like it wasn’t good enough. I had so many mixed emotions about making videos. On one hand I had some success gaining viewers and subscribers and if felt rewarding to connect with others and create a video from start to finish. Yet, I was overly critical of myself which led me to “giving up” for some time. I figured if I I didn’t have the energy or will to do it near perfectly and consistently, I minus well not do it at all.

I happened to check on my channel the other day and noticed I had gained a number of new subscribers during my hiatus. It’s funny because I wasn’t trying to grow my channel, just as I had gone into my first video with zero expectation. I was inspired to go back to my beginner’s mindset and start over in a sense, without demanding too much of myself and having fun.

I was nervous at first, over thinking my words and stumbling over them. My perfectionist mind kept wanting to sound eloquent and hit all the points I was trying to make. It wasn’t polished but it came together after some editing. It was a step in the right direction because I finally put myself out there again in an imperfect way and with acceptance of that imperfection. I simply felt like sharing insights without demanding it look a certain way.

The video is titled “Goal Setting and Self Compassion” and hits on themes I’ve talked about in the last few Weekly Motivations, just expressed differently. If you’d like to check it out and/or subscribe to my channel head here.

What I’d like for you to take away from this is that if you feel like sharing something, making something or being something but are feeling stuck due to perfectionism and over thinking, bring back the curiosity and playfulness of doing it for the first time. Let go of your own demands and need for it to look a certain way, and trust the process. Focus on having fun and let the chips fall where they may. If you stumble like I did, take a deep breath and remind yourself that the world doesn’t need any more “perfect,” it needs more You, doing what you love.

Goal Setting + Self Love Journeys

Hello friends:

In my last newsletter I mentioned how I was challenging myself to work 10 hours towards my creative projects/side hustle. Last week I began mid-week and accomplished 3.5 hours which was under goal. I had planned on setting time during a long layover at the beach (in between dipping + tanning 😉 ), but was instead rerouted and worked non-stop for three days (oh the joys of working in the airline industry).

Sometimes things don’t go as planned but it’s all about how we react to the unexpected trajectories and perceived “failures.” Most importantly, it’ about the relationship we have with ourselves through it all.

In the past, failing to accomplishing a goal would have made me feel like a loser. Like I wasn’t trying hard enough and that it may not be worth it to continue striving. It would have fed a belief that I’m just not good at consistency or “putting in the work.”

But, I’m choosing a different story now. One of compassion and understanding. I am simply doing my best. The fact that I set aside 3.5 hours for my creative work is a win, specially during my first week of being more intentional about time. And this week—and for the many weeks to come, I have the opportunity to keep working towards those 10 hours in a positive way.

I choose to see this as progress rather than a set back. With that, the weight is removed from my shoulders, I can breathe deeper and continue having fun with this—(may I remind myself)—self imposed challenge.

Instead of not feeling valuable until I create a set amount of work, I can use this “challenge” as a practice of self love + compassion no matter what ❤

Working towards those 10 hours per week is more about the journey than the destination. Just like self love.

I’ll explain:

I used to think self love was a goal to reach, at the end of continual self development and improvement. Each time I thought I had finally reached the most ideal relationship with myself, I would be presented with an emotional challenge that revealed just how much more profound my self love could be; how there was so much more room to love and accept myself— in all the crevices that still carried shame, guilt, emptiness, or whichever emotion manifested the idea of not being enough. It’s a never ending journey with an opportunity for more depth at every moment, whether you’re enduring a high or a low.

I know better now than to think reaching a goal can define me or make me feel more valuable; in other words make me more lovable to myself.

The opportunity to truly love every bit of yourself lies in the journey of it all; which includes the imperfections, the failures and the incessant striving on its own. We have the power to feel enough and loved wherever we’re at, and when we do that, every dream and every goal becomes an added bonus—a fun journey to be had.

Let’s see what we can do, and all that we can accomplish from a place of already being enough.

Love,

Gabriela