A Trip Through Time

The greatest perk of being a flight attendant are the travel benefits, which I hadn’t yet used *for fun*. I’d been so consumed in adjusting to this lifestyle, moving, and visiting my boyfriend in Utah, that I hadn’t yet tapped into this blessing.

I finally had the perfect opening, and seized the opportunity to travel to my favorite place in the world: Lisbon, Portugal. On my way back home, I was granted a first class seat that fully reclined into a bed. It was a moment of total gratitude.

I’d imagined that one day, I would travel this luxuriously, but I never anticipated it would happen so soon. I used to think that in order to experience certain luxuries, I would have to be super rich. This experience alone reminded me that abundance can show up in so many fun ways other than a paycheck, and that life is constantly blessing us. I wrote about abundance in one of my previous newsletters, if you’d like to read more on that topic.

Soul City

7 years ago, Lisbon stole my heart. I had been studying abroad in Spain when I took a trip with classmates to Lagos, Portugal and had one of the best weekends of my life. Portugal had never been on my radar ’til then, so I decided to check out Lisbon shortly after. It was the second trip I took on my own, which was very meaningful to me. Solo-travel has changed my life by changing the relationship I have with myself and with the world. I discuss this more thoroughly in my latest video.

Anyways, when I walked through Lisbon, something clicked. It was as if I had found my soul-city — something I didn’t even know existed. It felt warm and familiar, like home — yet it delighted and awakened me, the way hearing a beautiful song for the first time stirs your soul. I returned for my last weekend in Europe before going back to the US, and never imaged it would take so long to get back…

It was naive to think I would have the exact same experience returning. After all, 7 years is plenty of time for a place to shift, and even more so — for my own perceptions to change. I was a little disappointed to see how flooded with tourists Lisbon is now, because I loved how authentic and raw it used to feel. Nevertheless, it still pulled my heart strings the way it always does. On my last day, I followed my intuition and wandered through lonelier streets still seemingly reserved for locals, reconnecting with that authentic and down-to-earth energy I fell in love with.

The biggest take away from the trip though, was reconnecting with my younger-self. I was 21 when I fist encountered Lisbon, and returning allowed me to consider where I was in life back then. I used to think that my 21-year-old-self was so different & unexperienced compared to where I am today. I actually realized how much a past-version of myself could teach me.

21-year-old Gaby was a true free-spirit. She was led by a huge desire to see the world, seizing each opportunity to visit new places. This was the start of a new era, where she began to spend time in new environments alone, learning to dance between loneliness and a fondness for her own company. Though she was experiencing some heart-break, she made sure to have plenty of fun, making some of the most epic memories to date. She let herself be free, sometimes to the point of overindulgence — yet, she bounced back from anything, flowing and perceiving with a positive attitude. A newfound sense was coming over her, of just how capable it was to make her dreams come true.

Thinking back, I realized what a transformative time that was for me, and how much I owe to that younger version of myself. That spark, adventurous spirit, and courage is what propelled me to see and experience so much to this point. I’ve learned I could incorporate more of her sense of freedom and fun-loving ways. As I get older, I tend to take myself more and more seriously, feeling the weight of having to accomplish, succeed, and figure shit out on a certain timeline. What if the path is simply to live, to explore, and to keep the focus on what brings us joy? Where would we go if we flowed a little more, trusting the timing of our lives?

I spent a day in Lisbon hanging out with some girls in their early 20’s from Spain. They were kind, funny, wise (and vegan environmentalists) — all qualities I admire. Unsure of what they really want to do with their lives, they were taking some time off to explore the world, finding creative ways to do so on a budget. We sat down for coffee after a morning of walking through the windy, upward roads of the Alfama district.

The conversation turned to my career, and I shared my ambitions for the future with them. “It’s so nice to hear someone with goals,” one responded.

“Someone who knows what their goals are,” another clarified. It hit me in that moment, that I had in fact, come a long way in that respect. I can finally pin-point what I want to achieve.

“Don’t worry, I didn’t know what I really wanted at your age either,” I related.

But, reflecting now, I think I always knew the gist. Maybe all I ever really wanted was to live a life I’m proud to live.

Is this right for me?

I’m learning not to be so black and white about things.

For so long, I’ve been knee-deep in the coaching world. I consumed so much inspirational and motivational content from coaches I admired and jumped on the bandwagon of their beliefs. They echoed thoughts, such as: “if you think and feel abundant, abundance will come” (invest in yourself, even when it’s freaking scary), “know your worth + value” (charge a lot) and “people are waiting to hear your message” (self-promotion is key). I really wanted all of this to work: for my business to be successful, to see results quickly and to prove all the skeptics wrong.

It’s not that I don’t think it’s still possible anymore. I’m just more aware of the effort that actually goes into growing a business and brand, and that I have a lot to learn. There is no one way of doing things. I’m preparing for this to be a long-term process with its own ups and downs, which I’m willing to push through, even if my success isn’t immediate (as advertised).

I’m becoming more aware of how I can stay true to myself, too. It’s so easy to put successful individuals on a pedestal and take their word as gospel. I don’t blame myself for it, but going forward I’d like to tune in with what feels right to me. (This is a continuos lesson).

There are some things around self-promotion for example that coaches recommend doing which I don’t feel totally comfortable with and need to find my own way of executing. Sure, there is healthy advice and ways I can push myself to succeed, but the key is to be discerning and question: Is this right for me?

Turning In

One of the things that’s appealing about writing a blog to me, is that it’s not highly recommended these days. Most business coaches would tell you it’s a better idea to focus on growing your social media, to create videos, or even start a podcast. But a blog–that’s outdated.

I guess I have a rebellious streak. I yearn for authenticity and even if writing is no longer popular, it feels great to do it. This medium allows me to express my thoughts in a way that’s uniquely me.

This blog represents going with my gut. Choosing a path that feels right to me, regardless of what some seasoned experts say. My passion lies in living a life that’s truly authentic, and helping others do the same. This blog is an ode to that.

As an entrepreneur, it’s been tricky to make decisions based solely on what feels right to me. You have all this freedom, yet that freedom can be overwhelming and sort of frightening. For over a year now, I’ve studied the words of other successful entrepreneurs, taken courses, and even hired a business coach. Some of their methods didn’t always jive with me, but I’ve tried them anyways. Other times, I’ve gotten stuck and refused to do anything–whether it was their way or mine.

This push and pull between what feels right to me and other people’s methods and opinions has been a defining part of my journey. Though I was learning from the process itself, and from these mentors, I felt, in many ways, that I wasn’t being true to my own inner guidance.

One of the stronger suggestions I received from coaching mentors was to pick a niche (an area of expertise), and focus on one problem I could help my clients solve. This idea felt confining to me–hell, even the idea of labeling myself solely as a “coach” felt confining. I wanted to expand, to create without limitations. I yearned for the freedom to express myself in whichever way felt right, and to share whatever message I was inspired to contribute, regardless if it fit my niche or not.

Then, I thought about the people I admired and how they had reached success by being rule breakers, or by creating their own unique strategies at life and business. They had owned their authenticity and ran with their intuition. I realized, there is no prescription to my ideal life and definition of success, and if I was going to trail blaze my way through this, I’d have to do it by following my gut.